#53. LGBTQ – About Coming Out

This Conversation Will Help You…

1. Assess if it’s safe to come out (family, money, living situation, etc) and prioritize personal safety
2. Know that coming out is an ongoing process, not a one-time thing
3. Understand that others need time to absorb the knowledge

Think About This First

• Do you know people who have come out as gay, bi, trans*, etc? (* Trans* [with the * symbol] leaves room for the person who identifies as trans* to fill in the rest themselves, since there are so many word options. Two options could be “transgender” or “trans man”)
• How old were they?
• Did their family support them? If someone’s family didn’t support them, how would that affect that person? What about school, work, having a place to live? It’s important that people think about these things when they are thinking about coming out.

Having the Conversation

Start here:

Do you think there’s a way where someone could come out and never have to come out again?

Is that realistic?

Most people find that they have to come out over and over again through their lives. Why do they have to keep coming out?

Continue:

Why do people have to come out at all?

We tend to assume that people are straight, which makes them have to tell us their identity.

How long do you think someone would think about coming out before actually coming out?

Is there an average time, do you think? If it’s a big and scary decision, do you think it would be a bigger thing to think about? It might take more time.

If someone’s friend of family member comes out to them for the first time do you think they will accept it right away? Should they?

Realistically, how long do you think it would take for someone to understand?

Does this relate at all to the time it took the person to decide to come out?

How are these similar?

Keep Talking:  

If someone was going to come out to you, what do you think a good way to say it would be?

What if the person was coming out to their parent?

What are ways you think you could make it easier for someone to come out to you?