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This Conversation Will Help You…

Talk about the ways virginity is viewed in our society
Express own view about virginity, its importance
Understand that different people view virginity differently, & be able to express opinions

Think About This First

Talking about virginity is a way to introduce the subject of sex, and gives a framework for future conversations. This conversation also incorporates discussion about values, societal expectations, and personal boundaries.

Having the Conversation

Start Here:

What are ways that virginity is viewed in our society?

What are the things you hear most frequently?

Is virginity a big deal?

What are the different things you hear about virginity based on someone’s gender?

Let me tell you about how virginity was viewed when I was your age.

What are other things that would impact how something thinks about virginity? Some other things are: religion, family values, media, and friends.

Continue:

What do you think about virginity?

Is it a big deal to stay a virgin?

When is it okay to not be a virgin anymore?

Is there a certain age, or life event that makes it okay?

Is there a stigma about being a virgin or not being a virgin?

Keep Talking:

What does sexual orientation have to do with virginity?

Virginity is talked about frequently in terms of sex between a man and a woman (specifically, vaginal intercourse). What are some other acts that are also sex?

How does having different definitions of sex affect how people talk when deciding to have sex?

What are some other words/euphemisms for sex (sleeping together, hooking up)? What do they all mean?

What are ways people could be more clear about what they consider “sex”?

What is the most common definition of virginity among the people you know?

Do you agree with this definition? How would you describe virginity?